Without You
by thepiraticalconductor
Summary: Blaine bit his lip to keep from smiling too obnoxiously. He was, after all, in the middle of the Lima Bean during afternoon rush. He didn't need to be carted off to the psych ward before he got his caffeine fix.


"Hey, are we still going to the drive-in _Casablanca _in Parma this weekend, love?" Kurt asked through the ear piece of Blaine's phone. "Spring break's starting and I can't wait to spend all the time I want with you, especially if it involves cuddling in your tiny car and watching old movies."

Blaine bit his lip to keep from smiling too obnoxiously. He was, after all, in the middle of the Lima Bean during afternoon rush. He didn't need to be carted off to the psych ward before he got his caffeine fix.

"That sounds wonderful, Kurt. Pick you up at six?" he asked as he took another step forward in line. "Or should I come over earlier so your dad can grill me?"

"Nah, Dad already asked you all the questions he could think of when you came over to take me on our first date. But perhaps you should come over at five thirty. You never know with fathers." Blaine sighed at the sound of Kurt's giggle, distorted just enough through the phone to remind him. He frowned, that feeling of a gnawing, aching loneliness starting in the pit of his stomach.

"You done with Warblers rehearsal for the day?" his boyfriend asked.

"Yeah," Blaine said simply. "Yeah. Everyone misses you. We're still trying to figure out how our dynamic is going to work without you. The tenors are at a little bit of a loss," he chuckled under his breath. "I miss you, Kurt." Four words that carried much more weight than Blaine wanted Kurt to know. Thad, David and Wes had been watching him all week like hawks. There was barely any time that he was by himself. At least one of them was always with him if they could manage it. They tried to be subtle and failed miserably, but Blaine knew they were just trying to help. He didn't want to tell them that their badgering was only making things worse.

Jeff, the tall baritone with the floppy blonde hair, had actually been the only one to help. It had been an innocent enough rouse. Jeff and Blaine were in Calc BC together, so he had wandered up to him during study hall. He didn't say much. Jeff never did. Usually he was too busy hanging out with Nick to talk to Blaine, but here he was.

"Did Thad send you?" Blaine had drawled after a few moments. Jeff shook his head.

"No. I just...I've seen how sad you are, Blaine. I thought you ought to know that we're all sad. Not because we lost a great voice for the Warblers but because we lost a friend. Kurt was part of our family," he said. "We all saw how happy he made you, even when you two were just friends. You glow when he's around you," Jeff laughed. "Love suits you. And...well, I don't really know where I was going with this, but I thought you'd like to hear that. You two are pretty damn magical and I know you'll be together again, Blaine. I just...I know it," he finished with a laugh. Blaine blinked and stared at him as he walked out, flashing Nick a smile as he passed where he was wrestling with _Hamlet. _

"Blaine?" Kurt said. "Blaine, are you there?" Blaine shook himself and scurried forward in line.

"Yeah, sorry. Zoned out."

"I was saying that I miss you too. I miss seeing you every day...I know it's selfish, but I wish you were here with me," Kurt sighed.

"I know, baby. I wish I were too. Maybe I can talk my parents into transferring next year. They don't have _unlimited_ funds, after all. And I'm sure they'd love to pocket the money they spend on tuition," Blaine said. "Especially my dad." His voice was a lot more bitter then he had meant, but talking about his father brought that out in him. Blaine remembered the conversation between his mother and father before he transferred to Dalton. His mother had wanted him pulled out of school and sent off to Westerville on the double. His father...not so much.

"Well, maybe if he wasn't such a fag, he could defend himself, now couldn't he?"

Blaine ground his teeth. He _loathed_ thinking about his father, wanted every memory of him to just go away and never come back. Kurt...Kurt had made him forget, even if for a little bit. Now that he was gone, it seemed like his father was always in his head.

"I'm sorry, Blaine. Have you told him? About us, I mean?" Kurt asked, his voice hesitant.

"No. I told my mom, but she promised not to breathe a word. Is that sad? That I can't even trust my own father to know that I have a boyfriend?" he asked.

"No, Blaine. I'm lucky that my father is as accepting he is. I wish it weren't so, but not everyone has that luxery. You know if you told Carol about him, she'd go down to your house and give him a very large piece of her mind, right?" Blaine laughed. He had only ever met Carol once, when he had gone over to Kurt's to see him one last time before returning to Dalton. Sure, she had kind of treated him like a puppy, but it was clear that she liked him. It felt nice to be so accepted like that.

"Yes, I know. Carol can be pretty scary, I hear," he chuckled. The sharp peal of a school bell signaled the end of their conversation.

"I have to go to Calc. Mrs. Triana is killing me to catch up. I'll see you on Friday, right?" Kurt asked. From the sound of the interference on his end, he was trying to gather his things and fix himself up at the same time.

"Of course, Kurt. I'll see you then."

"Goodbye, Blaine," Kurt said.

"Goodbye, Kurt." Blaine replied, smiling before hanging up and putting his Blackberry in his pocket. It was his turn next and he shuffled up to the cashier. "One medium drip and one grande non-" He paused. "Nevermind. Just the drip, please."

"$3.25," the barista said, giving Blaine back his change without any expression.

When the warm coffee finally reached the counter, it looked...lonely. Just one cup, instead of two. The Lima Bean buzzed around him, but he couldn't take his eyes off it. His vision blurred and in one swift move, he grabbed the cup and tossed it in the trash, walking as briskly as he could to get out of there. He knew it was silly, to cry over coffee, but without Kurt the entire routine seemed meaningless.

The pavement seemed to fly away beneath Blaine's feet as he practically ran back to school. He could feel the tears streaming down his face, but he didn't move to wipe them away. He didn't care who saw. He just wanted to go back to his room, turn on sad music and cry until he fell asleep. Was it pathetic? Probably. Did he care? Absolutely not.

He pushed through a gaggle of Warblers as he reached the front doors of the school.

Thad stumbled back as Blaine's shoulder connected with his.

"Blaine? Blaine, you okay?" he asked, making a move to go after him. Jeff grabbed his wrist and shook his head.

"Leave him, Thad. There's nothing we can do right now. He'll be okay in his own time. I know it."


End file.
